I waver back and forth about the debt-education relationship I have with my school. Naropa is a fairly new liberal arts school accredited in the past thirty years. It was started as an insitute by a tibetan monk named Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche, who wanted to bring tibetan buddhism to the west. Essentially he met the hippies and Naropa was born. What drew me to the school was the meditation base , yoga, and the environmental studies focuses on the sacred.
I think a liberal arts degree could go many ways honestly. In the best light a degree can allow a person to have a career and support themselves, their family, and serve their community. Perhaps thats the issue with a liberal arts degree is that it loses the “career” attainment factor, and it’s more about the knowledge attained. hence why many people go to continue education after undergrad.
in the end its what you do with your education. thank you naropa for introducing me to boulder, trungpa and his crazy wisdom, and the many amazing creative caring passionate people I have met.
I would argue that caring for your body in traditional ways- like eating a healthy diet, exercising, and taking your vitamins- may be the least important part of your health. (I know! Radical idea coming from a doctor!)
This may sound shocking to you. After all, you’ve probably watched many other doctors get on television to tell you that your health is all about using food as medicine, getting enough exercise, and avoiding bad habits. I’m not suggesting that those aren’t great health-inducing behaviors. What I’m saying is that it doesn’t matter how great your diet is if your body is flooded with stress hormones! No amount of kale is going to counterbalance the toxic effects of high levels of cortisol and epinephrine on your body.
So what’s the most important part of your health? The nature of your thoughts, beliefs, and feelings. When your thoughts, beliefs, and feelings are positive, relaxation responses are activated, healing hormones like oxytocin, dopamine, nitric oxide, and endorphins are released, and the body’s natural self-repair mechanisms are activated, allowing the body to do what it does best-heal itself."
- Lissa Rankin, M.D
currently I live in boulder, colorado in a house with 3 other women, all working/going to school. its diverse and pretty cool bc they are all doing meaningful work. one girls film-making, another works for congress in denver, and the other is in non-profit youth ministry work. I get super cheap rent I can afford with my job. I live in a basement room. just got a curb-side bookcase. I have a twin mattress on the floor. lavender walls, and brown carpet. pretty big closet.
We have a view of the flatirons and it has been snowing a ton for the past 3 days. I didnt go to class or work on monday. super exhausted. I went to work with the kids at the learning center yesterday morning. the learning center is a non-profit educational center, for pre-k through high school. i work with the pre-k and kindegarten kids. I love it! i am learning a little bit of spanish. I feel so good leaving there, and the women are so nice & sweet. its a really nice community to be apart of. after that I have an environmental economics class which I get angry in sometimes, because im poor (but making the best of it) because I have a lot to work with. creativity, friends, a desire to help others. Im working on being present with the classes I have til mid-may. i finally finish undergrad this fall.
I also work for a womens clothing/ consignment store which I give my best at. I want to work at this hardware/garden store. I applied for a grant writing internship for the summer. Looking at a nother internship in denver, though it would be hard commuting there without a car. hoping to apprentice at the apothecary in town, that would make my life, and would be so valuable, especially since I really want to learn more herbs (and make tinctures, salves) to make it acessible to everyone. not just monetarily privileged.
working on creating a gardening event for my school. also helping put on earth day. friends band is playing. shall be fun.
it has been a 2 1/2 year journey with healing my relationship to my body, to food, with others, with work, with my home life.
i have hit the lowest of lows, and have been graced with joy and happiness.
there are some days i feel so depressed I dont want to move from my bed. there are times I cant make sense of my life, where my mind just goes in circles. there are times I feel expansive, peaceful, and at ease. there are times when I feel like I can do everything I ever wanted to do (whoa). there are times when I feel my prayers are heard. there are times I feel like I actually help someone.
I am grateful for the people I have met and connected with, and the people I will meet in the future. the people have been what have made this life all worthwhile.
also::: I am making the intention to let go of relationships or relationship patterns that hinder everyone involved. aka holding onto a dream relationship. hoping something is working or changing from what it truly is. I am learning to accept a relationship for what it is, and then continue on. Im a bit tired of short term romantic relationships that fizzle out. I am also tired of going for people I wasnt even sure of in the first place. I want to be SURE of the next person I am intimate with. (i also want to be just friends with guys).
I am still talking person I was dating in NY. there is a part of me that hopes it could somehow work out (him move out here/visit, or me move back to east coast for grad school and work it out between us). though from the beginning it felt like we had a lot to “work out” emotionally. we were friends first, though he dated my friend before me (big no-no to like everyone ever). i really do care about him. it may have been temporary and the relationship a teacher for both of us. i really dont know whats gonna happen for us right now. i feel like i dont always trust him, and that hes really needy (im needy too). so yeah. jai ma.